Faith, Liberty, Friendship
Jokes
Use this thread to post funny jokes.
Two cannibals meet one day. the first cannibal says, you know, i just can't seem to get a tender missionary. i've baked them, i've roasted them, i've stewed them, i've tried every sort of marinade. i just can't seem to get them tender. the second cannibal asks, what kind of missionary do you use? the other replied, you know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. they have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads. ah, ah! the second cannibal replies. no wonder. . . those are friars!
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Permalink Reply by Brian Bass on -
A Marriage Made in Heaven
On their way to a justice of the peace to get married, a couple has a fatal car accident. The couple is sitting outside heaven's gate waiting for St. Peter to admit them. While waiting, they wonder if they could possibly get married in Heaven. St. Peter finally shows up and they ask him.
St. Peter says, "I don't know, this is the first time anyone has ever asked. Let me go find out," and he leaves.
The couple sits waiting for two months and begins to wonder if they really should get married in Heaven, what with the eternal aspect of it all. "What if it doesn't work out?" they wondered. "Are we stuck together forever?"
St. Peter finally returns after yet another month, looking somewhat bedraggled. "Yes," he informs the couple. "You can get married in Heaven."
"Great," says the couple. "But what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?"
St. Peter, red-faced, slams his clipboard onto the ground.
"What's wrong?" exclaims the frightened couple.
"Come on!" St. Peter exclaims. "It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it's going to take me to find a lawyer?"
© 2012 Created by Brian Bass.
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